My rescue by my Knightess Gloria of Parsley, Champion of the Order of the Turnip
Leaf, and Emptier of the Royal Pellet Tray, on the 27th of June, did not come soon enough to keep me from becoming matted,
dirty, and bald (courtesy of my brothers). However, she did arrive eventually to rescue me from bondage.
She was doing a demonstration of spinning at a local store at the time so she
was unable to immediately stop everything, take me home, build my Palacito, and feed me. She did, however, get me some water,
which I graciously deigned to drink.
When she finally got me home, and installed in my newly assembled palace, she
began seriously researching rabbits on the Internet. One of the places she liked the best was the House Rabbit Society web-site,
www.rabbit.org. I think she read every single article on that site! She also found a good translation page so that she
could understand my decrees without incurring my displeasure,
A day or so after my coronation as Ruler of the Kingdom I was driven 10 miles to meet with my Royal Physician
who declared me hale and hearty.
Since I have been elevated to my proper status as Ruler of the House, my routine
has become better suited to my wishes. Each morning I am greeted, and then taken outside to my Royal Spa for my constitutional.
I do laps in my bunny-tractor and do binkies and just generally jump up in the air and twinkle my toes. I also graze on the
organically grown grass. My diet is carefully regulated (I only get one TINY slice of apple, no matter how much I demand more)
which I am sure that my human subjects do for my best health. I do this for at least an hour and a half, at which time my
Knightess gets in and sits with me so that I can practice my climbing skills, and get lots of pettings.
Then I come back inside, where my salad awaits along with fresh water. I spend
the day lounging in my palace and watching my subjects as they spin or weave. Early in the evening, while they are watching
something on the noisy box that they call "news", they groom me and tell me how
beautiful I am (which is only the truth,
I did develop a small yeast/staph infection in my ears, which apparently is not
unusual for those of us with correctly shaped ears. However, my Royal Physician dispensed a medication which my humans put
in my ears, morning and evening, for seven days. I didn't mind it too much as I got a very good ear massage out of the applications.
The hair on my head has mostly grown back, the mats are out of my coat, and life
Thus ends Part the First of the Royal Chronicles of Princesa Querida Conejo.